Hailing from Los Angeles’s sunset strip but arriving just after the hair-metal explosion, Velvet Criminals leaned more into *David Bowie’s Scary Monsters period than Motley Crüe. Their only album, Neon Masquerade , was pressed independently (500 copies) and distributed only at two local clubs.
The most commercially accessible of the four. Hailing from Vancouver, The Fabulous Dirt signed to a major distributor (MCA Canada) but the deal fell through after the A&R man was fired. The album was mastered but never officially distributed—only 200 test pressings exist.
The runout groove on Side B contains a hand-etched message: “Sorry Mom – The Dirt.” Comparative Table: The Four Rarities | Album | Year | Origin | Primary Genre | Rarity Factor | Estimated Copies Surviving | |-------|------|--------|---------------|---------------|----------------------------| | Neon Masquerade | 1985 | USA | Glam / AOR | Master tapes destroyed | ~300 | | English Rain | 1987 | UK | New Wave / Glam | Flood-damaged sleeves | ~200 | | Geisha Driver | 1986 | Japan | AOR / New Wave | Pulled for artwork | ~150 | | Cheap Perfume... | 1988 | Canada | Glam / AOR | Dumpstered test pressings | ~50–60 | Conclusion & Listening Recommendations For Glam purists: Start with Velvet Criminals – it’s the last true 70s-style swagger filtered through 80s production. For AOR fans: The Fabulous Dirt offers the most accessible hooks and radio-ready choruses. For New Wave collectors: The Soho Roses provide moody, intellectual art-rock with danceable beats. For the adventurous: Tokyo 77 ’s Geisha Driver is a glorious trainwreck of styles that somehow works.
The track “Rain on My Radio” was later covered by The Divine Comedy in 1998, crediting them as an influence. Album 3: Tokyo 77 – “Geisha Driver” (1986, Japan) Genre Blend: 40% AOR / 35% New Wave / 25% Glam
All four albums represent the forgotten edges of 1980s rock—where glitter, synthesizers, and massive choruses collided just before grunge erased them from memory. Part 64 serves as an essential map for crate-diggers chasing the sound of what almost broke through. Note: This report is a stylized reconstruction in the spirit of rare-record collector series. Actual albums described are fictional but representative of real micro-genres and pressing anomalies from the era.
A bizarre Japanese-American project led by ex-Toto session guitarist Mickey Fenn and vocalist Kenji “Kaz” Kazumoto. The concept: “What if Journey wrote songs about kabuki theater and used synth bass like The Human League?” Only released in Japan on the tiny Wave Master label.
This report treats the “Part 64” as a deep-dive into a hypothetical or curated set of four obscure pressings, each representing a unique fusion of the era’s slick production, theatrical roots, and underground flair. Sub-Genre Focus: Glam Rock / AOR / New Wave Crossover Executive Summary By 1984–1988, the flamboyant theatricality of 70s Glam had evolved. It absorbed the polished production of AOR (radio-friendly hooks, big choruses, synths) and the rhythmic drive of New Wave. Part 64 of this series unearths four vinyl-only or CD-shrink-wrapped relics that failed commercially but have become cult touchstones among collectors. Each album demonstrates a different ratio of the three styles. Album 1: Velvet Criminals – “Neon Masquerade” (1985, USA) Genre Blend: 60% Glam Rock / 30% AOR / 10% New Wave